In a series of ironic adventures, I was asked to review this book for Dr. Jennifer Ashton, an Ob-Gyn in New Jersey. Ironic, because my last term in school revolved around my own writing of “postpartum” manuals for women, but in a “straight talk” sort of way that really makes my heart sing. If you’ve really been following my blog, you may have noticed that my current (and last) term is about female sexuality (and its evolution in literature and society, as defined in these sorts of books where such topics were formerly taboo, or extremely clinical). And, finally, I recently had the pleasure of discussing oral sex with my son, and I did use the line from a Dr. Oz show – that he can still catch an STI via oral sex.

Had I been paying attention to my P.O. Box and the name of the doctor on the show,  I would have fallen over from coincidence. The woman whose words really prompted me to even mention oral sex to my son was Dr. Jennifer Ashton. I am a little embarrassed to admit that I didn’t put two and two together until the publishing company reminded me, after reading my sex talk blog, that I had committed to this book review.

Now that we got that all out of the way, I really want to applaud The Body Scoop for Girls. As a teenage girl, I moved from Ohio (where sex ed was pretty clinical) to Arkansas (where sex ed was learned in the back of a pick-up truck). As I’ve mentioned, my parents were diagnosed with HIV and later passed from AIDS. During that time, nobody ever told me that I could get HIV from oral sex, and I was pretty well-educated (I thought) for a teenager. Lucky for me, oral sex was a privilege, not a right. My point is that there was a lack of sex education during my tween/teen years that is still happening today, and at the same time, it appears there is an increase in sexual activity. Abstinence-only education is not helping, obviously, and that’s why this book and this doctor is so very important.

Back in the day,  I went to a free clinic one day to get put on the pill (not because I was having sex, but because I wanted a note to skip school that day) and since I’d had sex one time (subsequently swearing off sex forever)  but hadn’t had a period for six weeks, they told me I could be pregnant. GASP. I was 16.

My friend and I bought a pregnancy test – one with cups, droppers and other paraphernalia (things are much easier today) and I somehow lost the stick before I got home to take the test. I stored the unused (and incomplete) test in an old purse that was eventually found by my mother and stepfather, prompting them to put me on the pill. Lucky for me, I wasn’t pregnant, just a late bloomer under tremendous amounts of stress. For obvious reasons, dealing with a somewhat sexually active teenage daughter was not high on my parents’ list of priorities at that time, and I was just kind of left in the dark, with a disc of birth control pills. Meh, it was just a scare. Let’s bring on the boys!

I wasn’t alone, though. Most girls I knew learned about sex from Judy Blume, from Seventeen Magazine, movies or from trial and error. Finding a book like The Body Scoop for Girls would have been an amazing resource for all of us; for my high school friend who got pregnant at 14 and had an abortion, or my other high school friend who got pregnant and dropped out of school. Clearly, there was a disconnect in our sex education. I even know some women today who could use a refresher course on their bodies, the risks of sex, etc.

Dr. Ashton’s book puts sex, body issues, nutrition and safety in a warm, caring and accessible light. It has just enough authority to mean business, and just enough humor to calm the fears of teenage girls (and their parents). The book gives information in an easy-to-read manner. It doesn’t sugar coat the truth, but it gives the reader a chance to make her own decisions over her own body, and gives insight into what a phenomenal doctor-patient relationship should be.

I love this book, and as strange as it sounds, I agree with Dr. Oz who is quoted on the cover of The Body Scoop for Girls as saying, “I trust her with my daughters.” (Granted, my daughters are only four right now, but I like to plan ahead.) If you’re squicky about sex, then use this book as a buffer, as a way to talk to your daughter. If you’re confused about what is going on in her life, read the book. Remember what its like to be a teenage girl, and be the parent you always wish you had.The book is great, the message is fabulous, and there is no better time than today to encourage yourself, or a teenage girl, to take control of her body, her mind and her sexuality.

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So it’s under a month until Valentine’s Day and the age old question is hanging over my head – what do I get my man for Valentine’s Day? And, better yet, what do I get him that will benefit me, in the event his gift is lame?

In an effort to not have these two questions unanswered on February 13, I went to my favorite emporium of answers – the internet. I’ve looked at guitars – too pricey for V-day and get me nothing; lingerie – gets me laid, but uncomfortable and too much to spend for 10 seconds of glory; video games – while I will continue my reign as best wife ever… again, does nothing for me personally. I was beginning to despair until I stumbled across one of those creepy Google ads that tries to read your mind and sell you what you really want and need. There, on the right hand side of my hotmail, was the answer – panties!

Panties are a genius answer – I am always in need of an excuse to buy new ones, and they go on my ass, so in man speak they still count as lingerie! Score! Or is it? We’ve been married eleven years, he knows that I have a penchant for purchasing panties… hmm… how to get around looking as selfish as I really am?

Back we go to the internet! I’m thinking I could try boy shorts, not something I normally wear and the lace ones are sexy! Maybe I could branch out into something crotchless, nah… if I’m going commando, I’m going commando.  Maybe I could find panties with guitars on them, because nothing says I love you like the extra effort to combine sex and other favorite hobbies, right? But then I found this:

And this:

Yes world, I am going to make panties for Valentine’s Day! And I challenge you to do the same – here’s why: uber points from the significant other, you get new super cute panties, it’s an opportunity to do something kind for the earth by recycling old shirts and cloth, and you now have an excuse, a good excuse! to show off your underwear in public. Seriously, does life get any better?

PS: Did you notice that the panties in the first tutorial have a button crotch??!!!?

~ Mo Bollinger is head honcho over at Moments to Keep and makes cameo appearances on HippyMom as Scarlet Mae.

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How do you give an Aquarian an orgasm? Show them something new. Hopefully you have a never-ending supply of parts!

Ah, you weird, wonderful Aquarius! This is your month, all the way from January 20ish to February 18ish, depending on the year. Of course as with all astrology, if you really want to get technically accurate information you should go through the steps to do your chart. We love astrology at hippymom.com, so we’re always batting about terms like we know what they mean. And sometimes we really do!

The Aquarius in all her glory is someone who not only doesn’t fit in a box, but explodes the box. She hates being pinned down, can’t stand convention, and usually doesn’t do well in worlds not of her own making. The downside to this is that she seems a tad detached from beings who do not perform on cue. Think of an Aquarian as the mad scientist base jumper of the zodiac; there’s always a chance you’ll die, but at least it’s a new experiment!

Don’t think for a minute that you, Miss Stay at Home Mommy, have escaped this penchant to embrace your wacky wonderfulness. If you have been successfully contained within the four walls of a house, you’ve learned to rule with eccentricity rather than an iron fist, but you are still in charge. In fact, you’re the one most classified as the “cool mom” because even the neighborhood kids have figured out you’re weird. Embrace it, I say! Move to Australia and start a commune if you like. Before too long it will be a thriving, highly organized place that you can leave before emotions get too deep.
Yes, emotion. It’s okay to SAY the word. You don’t have to wade in knee-deep. We know you’d rather hold people at arm’s length, but curiously you are one of the most devoted friends around. You feel deeply and express–er, far less deeply. Maybe you’re not the mushy type, but you’re always available when someone needs you, unless of course you’re haring off to Australia to start a commune.

There’s a reason why message boards don’t contain a lot of Aquarians, and here’s the dirty little secret: they just get bored with the same old, same old. How can you compare chatting to base jumping? It just isn’t that exciting, and Aquarians need novelty more than just about any sign. A death knell to potential lovers, or a challenge? We’ll find out next time.

Smooches for another week—

Dipity

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